I'm Overwhelmed

So many times in life we get overwhelmed....

By the things on our "to do" lists, the things that don't even make it to our "to do" lists, the chores, the laundry, the amount of meals that need to be prepared on a daily basis, the needs of those around us, the lost, the dying, the orphans, the weak, the diseased, the poor, the rich....life can be overwhelming!

I'm overwhelmed. Not by all there is to do but in all that has been done. My precious King has overwhelmed me today with a beautiful glimpse into Calvary once again. With Pesach (Passover) coming up, I am overwhelmed at the great sacrifice that was given for me. Such great love was shown that I am afraid my life will always fall short in repaying Him for His. I am so overwhelmed.

I'm overwhelmed with a such a sense of Hope. Excitement. Joy!

I look into my children's eyes and I want to pick them up and spin them around and declare how much they are loved. By me and my Lord! I want them to be overwhelmed. I want them to know the surpassing greatness of His love and never forget it.

I, however, know that forgetting is something we (as humans) do. We forget, so often, the little things. And... we forget the big things, too. Even this great sacrifice on our behalf, we forget about it when we get busy with life. But, oh, when His sweet Mercy sweeps in like a gentle breeze, it reminds us again of His goodness and it overwhelms! He doesn't forget. He doesn't forget to remind us that He loves us...just like I remind my children continuously that I love them. Thank you Lord for reminding me.

I love this overwhelming feeling. It spills out of my eyes, down my cheeks and over my heart and it causes me to love more deeply....unconditionally.....graciously and mercifully. It causes me to forgive without contemplating whether or not I want to. It makes me want to sing even when there is no music. It makes me laugh when nothing is funny. It settles me like rain does spring pollens. It satiates my soul like nothing else can.

Life is full of challenges. I have them daily....but I'm so thankful that I'm overwhelmed!

Overjoyed!

This morning, after my time with the Lord, I felt that I was to visit my daughter's blog, KateRosen.blogspot.com. I was overwhelmed by her beauty and her love for her King. What greater joy could a mom have than to witness her daughter being conformed to the image of Christ? You see, I not only read her blog but I get to witness her behind the scenes. I get to experience the greatness of God as He changes hearts. I have the privilege of witnessing Kate's heart changing....I could list those changes but they are sacred. Just trust me. It's happening and oh God, I give you the glory! Her life is but a testimony to your faithfulness.

I remember when Kate was about 5 years old and I was standing in the kitchen praying to the Lord for a strategy in parenting...now I am seeing the fruit of His faithfulness. What a savior! Thank you Lord for her life and continue to draw her to your side. Fill her with your love and kindness. She is yours.

I love you Kate and treasure you.....and for those reading this post, I have 3 other wonderful children who have captivated my heart as well! I am a blessed woman!

Two Places at Once

I never knew it would be this hard to be away from a place you were at for only 5 weeks. Yet, that's exactly where I find myself.

Mexico came and went faster than I like to admit. Our experience there as a family was beyond words (as you can tell from my lack of blogging)....

So, here we are, at home in Colorado and yet so far from where my heart is. My thoughts take me back to a situation that happened in Vicente Guerrero.

Our family was going to bring a group of orphan children to the beach before leaving to head back to the States. These children were given instructions on what was expected and told that if they weren't cooperating that they would have to return to the orphanage. Steve was in route from being at Rancho de Cristo and hadn't arrived yet so I decided to take the boys to the market before getting Steve and going to the beach. About 30 minutes into our time together, one of the older boys (who I will refer to as Johnny) inflicted pain on one of the younger ones. While I didn't want to send him back to the orphanage, I knew that I had to keep my word for the sake of the other children. Otherwise, they would have all been given a license to be disobedient. So, we headed back to the orphanage but first stopped at our little Casa Blanca. I was buying time. I didn't want to send Johnny back but I felt obligated to keep my word. So, I picked up Steve and before we got in the van, I told him about the situation and said that I didn't want to go through with it but that I didn't know what else to do. He immediately said, "Don't do it". When he said that, I heard "Mercy". Steve began to pray and I knew instantly God was at work.

I asked Johnny to get out of the van. He fully expected to be walking down the path to the orphanage and he was very serious. His eyes were full of tears but his heart was hard. I told him I wanted to talk to him and I asked him if he knew what mercy was. He said "Pardon". I then asked him if he knew what a pardon was. He said "No". So I told him a story about a man who robbed a bank. I paused and asked him what should happen to the robber. I asked if he should go to prison or go free. He answered "prison". So I continued the story about how the robber was caught and brought before the bank owner. The bank owner looked at the robber and said 'You can go free'. I explained that this was mercy and that mercy is when you don't get what you deserve.

I told him that I wanted to give him the gift of mercy. I said that his actions warranted going back to the orphanage but that I wanted to love him by showing him mercy and having him spend the day with our family. He wouldn't look at me but the tears clung to his eyelids as he said "No". I was horrified. I began to plead with him to come and let him know that we loved him and desired to be with him. He was steadfast. Immoveable. He wasn't going to come. My heart raced within me because of the fear of further pain being caused to this child. Even though his actions warranted a form of discipline, I couldn't bear the thought of being the one to add another layer to his already hardened heart.

As I stood there trying to convince him to come, I reasoned that he wouldn't move and so I knew what I had to do. I handed the car keys to Steve and said, "You go on to the beach. If Johnny isn't going to come with us then I will go to his house with him. Johnny, I will sacrifice my day at the beach to be with you. I want to go to the beach but I want to be with you more." For the first time, his eyes met mine. He looked stunned as if this were a foreign concept. I said, "Please come with me. Please receive my mercy". The tears that had been waiting to fall now rolled down his cheeks as he threw his arms around me and began to sob. I stood there and wept aloud with him.

There were eleven faces pressed against the window of the van watching as this miracle unfolded. While my word needed to be honored, a greater glory needed to be seen. Mercy had to triumph over Justice. Love had to prevail. The obedience would follow if Love was experienced.

We spend the next four hours laughing and playing in the surf as one particular young man stayed near my side. Anytime anyone tried to push the boundaries of our agreement, Johnny would shout a word of encouragement to them and they would willingly comply. Harmony was the heartbeat of the afternoon.

Later, I took a picture with the boys that I had grown to love over our 5 weeks there but that day something was different. They had become mine. I had savored the full weight of the gospel in our lives and witnessed the power of Love.

As I sit here in the comfort of my home, I wonder what would happen if we would yield to the Spirit more. I wonder what would happen if we would let mercy work in our hearts more. I wonder if more sons would come to glory. I wonder if we would be more effective in our pursuit for the souls of men. I wonder why the miracle of Love has to be confined to Mexico. Could it be that Love can be two places at once?

Brussel Sprouts and Buckets!

So last Thursday night, we went out again to the migrant worker camps and shared the love of God with the people.

Now, before I tell you about this particular evening, I want to explain that there are a lot of migrant worker camps within an hour of this town and every week they go to 2 different migrant worker camps for adult evangelism. The next week they will target 2 other camps and the next week 2 more. The rotation begins over about every 5-6 weeks. Occasionally they will hit the same camp within a few weeks of the last visit but usually it's a fair rotation. Well, our first week here we went to a camp that's called ????? (I don't know how to say it or spell it so I'll call it North of Camalu). At this particular camp, there was a certain woman that I connected with and so I've been hoping to see her again but not expecting too. Also, Anna really hit it off with some of the children and cried all the way back to the orphanage at the end of the night because she had to leave them. The next outreach was at a place called San Francisco and again, Anna had a following!

Well, every week since we arrived, we've been either at one or the other of those two camps each time we've done adult evangelism. It's been crazy but amazing to have the opportunity to build relationships with these people through "sign" language, broken Spanish and love.

So, back to this week....we went back out to North of Camalu, and the woman that I had hoped to reconnect with wasn't there but this other woman was. Now she had watched me very carefully the first time we had gone there and even laughed at me a few times (I'm sure my Spanish is funny), and I was certainly making an impression...however, not a favorable one I was afraid. But this night when I saw her, she stared at me again and then started to watch me as I talked with other women but I was determined not to let her intimidate me. So after about an hour, I began to move her direction. Now this is the setting: there is an oversized lot full of rocks and trash and somewhat of a building that's about 20x20. There are multiple people sitting around the door, including this woman, with barefoot children running about. I began to make my way towards her and stopped about 10 feet away and said "Hola!". She nodded at me but didn't smile or respond with an answer. Then I asked in Spanish how she was doing? She nodded again. I smiled and just turned my body away from her towards the group but didn't leave. After a few minutes she got up, went inside and brought out a 5 gallon bucket, plopped it down on the ground and then backed up while motioning for me to sit down. I did and said "Gracias". A few minutes later she said something to her son, he went inside and came out with the biggest brussel spout I had ever seen. She held it and asked me if I liked them. I said yes and smiled real big (considering that's the first green vegetable I'd seen in a month!) and then she said something else to her son and he disappeared. We began to make small talk due to my limited Spanish vocabulary but had a nice conversation. I progressed slowly with it not wanting to overwhelm her with my type A personality and discovered that she wasn't as hard as I had originally thought. She was very soft under her rough exterior. A few minutes later her son emerged from their "house" with a plastic bag FULL of brussel sprouts and she handed them to me and insisted that I take them. The night continued to unfold, our group fed the migrant workers and then there was a time of ministry and we stayed near each other through the whole time, with me managing to visit with other women in the process. She occasionally gave me a nod of approval and a smile. A little while later she went back to her home and sat in her doorway again and periodically I'd look back her direction and she would nod at me. As the night came to a close, she approached me. She gave me another bag full of brussel sprouts. I tried to decline but she insisted. I learned from her broken English that she gleans these from the fields she works in all day. I was so honored to have received that gift from her. Before the night ended, this woman would end up sharing her food with me, giving me many smiles, a bucket to sit on (multiple times) and several hugs. The sweetest was when we stood side by side as the Gospel was presented.

I'll try to post a picture from that evening. Please keep this woman and her family in your prayers. As I looked into her home I was astounded at how much lack they have (no mattress, chairs, tables, only a pile of clothes and a few pots on a makeshift stove) and yet realized why they can't have anything. They move every few months and possessions are burdensome and yet, they need so much. It seems a contradiction. So her name is Reyna and she has 5 or 6 children, (I can't remember). Pray that the Lord will water the seeds of love that were sown into her heart and that even though her life is spent moving every few months, that she will find her lasting home in Christ.

I have tried to upload a few photos. There's one in there of Stephen and a little boy. Stephen gave this little boy his Crocs because he didn't have shoes. It turns out that this little boy is the son of the woman I spent time with that evening! God must have known that her family needed the extra attention.... God is good! Dios de bueno!